Wendy (Thanks, Wendy!!!), author of THIS great blog, posted an awesome article from Adoption.com called, “Gracious Answers to Awkward Adoption Questions.” I just read it and absolutely loved it! We are a family via transracial adoption and as our daughter gets older, we are asked more and more of these questions, and I really want to answer the best way I can to show her how proud we are of her and her heritage and that adoption is just another way families are created.

The entire article can be found HERE. One of my favorite sections states:

“Responses such as the above can gently educate others, especially if said with a smile. BUT WE ARE ANSWERING PRIMARILY FOR OUR CHILDREN’S EARS. In the few seconds that we have to prepare our response, we need to make a quick decision as to what words will best support our child’s self-esteem, protect the child’s privacy about his origins, and/or clarify that adoption builds “real” families with their “own” children. (The right answers come more quickly with practice.) Until more people learn the modern vocabulary of “birth parents” and “children by birth” we’re bound to be asked occasional seemingly insensitive questions about the child’s “real parents” and our “own” children. I believe that the fault is really in our outdated language more than in the person asking an awkward question. True, some people are not as sensitive as they might be, but usually they have a genuine interest and we would rather not embarrass them (and risk making things worse). We can generally find a gracious answer that will affirm the child without sounding critical of the person asking the question.”
It’s so true – I always want to correct people, but I don’t want to come across as too harsh, especially when they don’t mean any harm – they’re just curious. But, I also want to affirm my daughter in the process. It’s a great article! Definitely check it out!

🙂

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